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Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网+ o6 N( V6 W- L
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。7 c, l- i; o( D6 x: {9 tmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾陆英：# F' h; A5 D0 Y* ]( n- ^
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" o V8 @0 ~7 Umso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第+ J* |5 g0 M+ D( j& K
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; y+ S+ b T& U* Z' |mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：& }# g- q- B# S- N' O5 g
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。% q2 g, ?8 g* V' emso-font-kerning:0pt">”- p' H3 F8 G5 m9 q
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：" J* r4 g4 k6 r2 s6 f( U
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。& ?; T. I6 t; v! a4 `( Ycolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”! j9 u2 g- g+ `3 Z1 _8 Z
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5 ]1 o' j( H7 V( M$ Wmso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？3 x; Y! q4 s9 q. @# J
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：0 m6 F$ ~! Y' }: h4 b: `9 Q& B! k$ T
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。8 f5 `: k0 z% W; e
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/ i% x' Z" o0 t2 i4 p% `mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。6 {7 `* k, a& y& Y! Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。" ~) V R# \- o _6 J2 Y10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”* m; H3 B" n, Xmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;2 b8 I( m$ e: Q3 s: v0 r3 @( Z
mso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：+ B0 p3 W- T( H; B
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。! R/ `5 a- A4 F9 H- H. Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">"5 v8 p5 q& r( G. L; D) Ifont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
- B2 N4 @' a' a$ ]- f ]. \mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：; Z6 J% }+ Q; Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">"* ]* V$ A1 C: X+ ]3 c
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- C2 i( j* M+ T1 F, [+ hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢& J" [( A/ [' c5 j3 V% P
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：8 e$ ^) X3 T5 y1 ]9 ?8 V0 l9 [4 b0 [
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9 P8 k, h& a7 O. H0 ]* bmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。$ S7 E0 t0 ?" n) F9 ~' c' vmso-font-kerning:0pt">"
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是7 f( D1 r& ~# F
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# _7 x; s D% i9 Z# _/ h y) Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得( K! o+ d# A- _$ T# \! r* _9 Vmso-font-kerning:0pt">“( n J1 S5 U) E$ v9 G; \
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲) T7 q& p& }6 O: m* H% A D! C
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，3 l$ @5 f8 q0 A
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$ ~* H$ R A7 I, @4 Hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。) d' Y9 g' q. B, G [ \
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。. t& d$ o& K/ l% `
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9 P8 d x# l" p7 R) ^& S, qmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？2 {$ t$ l5 Q1 s: m1 r2 v10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义3 ?1 _" @$ a, S3 jmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！1 R' P2 L+ [" u
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" ?$ L: @, l" o# a, Imso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。4 ]8 s9 u* S4 H
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述; m2 H4 y8 U% P; x2 Omso-font-kerning:0pt">2' ~4 c. `: X1 d
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' M) J# p2 Z( W7 Y' l* J' amso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊& Q: ^ M0 z; k. r B
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。* `. }/ \" o/ E% v# t
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孝经
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* C) F" N3 e3 z2 L, l# {0 g6 STahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。 E3 q a, c+ A. [: k) y+ _
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7 F _* i5 P1 P& q0 j9 zmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。 M# d9 Y6 X( J+ p9 d0 l+ V. h/ I
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：/ A2 S0 Z0 X2 F" g( D- ^
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5 }+ I4 L0 g4 [3 B. _+ l$ smso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。( ~* H* `! B5 S3 Z" a0 i7 ^; Wmso-font-kerning:0pt">”8 V _9 R: l8 y3 z
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' Y0 ?+ F b' r, M' x- U. Omso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个! X. A; ^5 p( ^3 _) @% k' _
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% G; m# p/ k/ t# \mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬( X( W# t' e' T
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+ K4 M* J* m: B1 E0 \# q: X( \6 Z# Hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为6 O e: e3 u9 X4 A" K0 Hmso-font-kerning:0pt">“ X* ~! y+ u6 y0 j2 I- d! ifont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
3 R% L# a6 }" c6 gmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道7 L& x% _/ ~- H7 ^: z* l3 t# ]" o/ Rmso-font-kerning:0pt">”' l% C* V) C8 f: o" G
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。# d6 Z5 J |/ \# h3 `3 e8 ^mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的6 F7 H! b/ @8 P8 y8 N
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: _9 u: L# p8 Jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">顺) \: P1 z$ {6 I( m; v, b: g( P o( Smso-font-kerning:0pt">”# C# D& H5 s: e7 r3 ffont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
$ L/ V; P: @2 D' l! G# qmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思7 x+ Q8 K9 R0 @& h$ L% c
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